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this holy moment

Photo by Brady Knoll on Pexels.com

Last week I was driving home, with some lyrics in my mind, having trouble thinking of the song they came from. I had this weird and beautiful moment as I was stopped at a traffic light and then a dang train. The car radio was playing but it felt like such a place of peace and quiet that you could hear a pin drop. Caught up in this moment.

As these lyrics came to mind, I then turned them into prayer and friend, let me tell ya, my heart just broke in half. It wasn’t broken because of hurt or loss. It was broken for Jesus. It was broken because I realized he had been drawing me in, for days, through these random lyrics. Jesus, God’s son, that came to live on this earth for 33 short years, only to die on a cross. He died to pay the penalty for me and my sins. My past sins, current sins, and future sins. This wasn’t a moment of repentance but a moment of worship. A moment of gratitude. A moment of praise. A moment realizing my true need for him.

Most people think worship is only done on Sundays with rows of people surrounding you. Worship is each and every moment, if we are purposeful. Worship is a matter of the heart and where it is postured. I’ve been preparing for a mission trip, enjoying a little side hobby-turned-business, and getting things in gear at work. And this is on top of marriage, family, and ministry. I have not felt stressed or overwhelmed, but I can admit that my heart was still hanging onto its flesh, with its insecurities, agenda, and the world of Tammy. It was in these days, that this particular song was driving me crazy, only knowing portions of the song, and not even knowing the name of the song to look up. Have you ever just felt that nudging/pulling and not knowing where it was coming from? Some call it a “stirring in the heart.”

It finally came to me. God’s message for me. In a song. And, girl, it has been on repeat. Worship is not about a song or the words on the screen of your phone. Somehow in this car ride, on this particular day, it’s like God was telling me, Be still and know (recognize, understand) that I am God (Psalms 46:10 AMP). When we come to moments like this, thoughts like this, hearts devoted to HIM, above all else, this is worship. Above our agenda, our security, even our singing that we label “worship.”

I’m telling ya, I was brought to tears, and I am getting teary-eyed as I write this, thinking back to that precious moment with God. I want to cherish this sweet moment for all of my days. Music is a wonderful way to prepare our hearts for worship, to focus on Jesus, and to get our minds in tune with God’s. And man, when you recognize, know, and understand who God is, what he has done, what he is doing, and what he is going to do…it is majestic, it’s beautiful, it is peaceful. It is hard for me to even put in to words. Tell me you know what this experience is like.

And for those of you that have no clue what I’m talking about, I’d like to introduce you to my Jesus. A man, part-man/part-God, sent by God, lived on this earth to show us what love, compassion, and redemption looks like. He lived as a human, experienced everything we have experienced, came to die on a wooden cross, nails in his hands and feet, representing your past, your sins, your brokenness. He died and three days later, he rose. He left his Holy Spirit here with us to guide us, lead us, remind us of what Jesus did for us. Jesus has taken it all and made you a new human, a new creation, a new YOU. You are free from being a slave to your hurt, your past, your addiction, and your brokenness. Live FREE, Sister, because YOU ARE FREE. All you have to do is tell Jesus you need and want him in your life. If you are tired of going through the motions in life, feeling numb, or lost, invite Jesus in. Your life will forever be changed.

And when we bring ourself to this understanding, this is when true worship occurs. This is our foundation. This is us just wanting Jesus. Nothing else will fill us, heal us, or matter to us. Our agenda becomes his agenda. He is enough when we’re feeling “not enough.” And when we worship, through music, through prayer, through writing, through “just being caught up in his presence,” no matter where we are, we break from just going through the motions, from the numbness that we feel in life sometimes. We detach from our human, self-centered lives, exhausted from trying to do everything on our own. We have Jesus. You have Jesus. Invite him in. He’ll show up, even in the small moments while you’re sitting in the car, stuck in traffic. It’s beautiful, my darling and I want NOTHING ELSE for you.

Here’s the song I am talking about (with some of the lyrics):

I’m caught up in Your presence
I just want to sit here at Your feet
I’m caught up in this holy moment
I never want to leave; Oh, I’m not here for blessings
Jesus, You don’t owe me anything
More than anything that You can do
I just want You; I’m sorry when I’ve just gone through the motions
I’m sorry when I just sang another song
Take me back to where we started
I open up my heart to You
I’m sorry when I’ve come with my agenda
I’m sorry when I forgot that You’re enough
Take me back to where we started
I open up my heart to You

I just want You
Nothing else, nothing else
Nothing else will do

I’m coming back to where we started
I’m coming back to where we started
When I first felt Your love
You’re all that matters, Jesus
You’re all that matters
I’m coming back to what really matters
Just Your heart
I just want to bless Your heart, Jesus

If you’d like to chat some more about Jesus or if you simply need prayer for anything in life: womanhood, motherhood, couplehood, etc, I’d love to partner with you. You can send me an email at tammy@coffeemugsandbighugs.com.

You are cherished, sweet girl. God has a beautiful purpose and plan for you. He loves you and so do I!

Hugging you so tight,

Tammy

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